Does it ALSO dry up like a raisin in the sun? When I create a goal, I also map out what actions I will take that will move me towards my goal, as well as an attainable timeline. But have you ever been so caught up on achieving the goal you created, that you fail to realize that said goal is not really what you want?
That recently happened to me. I was wondering why it was so difficult for me to complete the simple actions I had mapped out that would have allowed me to reach my goal in a timely, stress-free manner. At some point something shifted. Perhaps it was something internal. Perhaps it was something I mentally ingested from one of my mental health/self-love podcasts. I have no clue what the specific accelerate was but whatever it was, I felt it and it was real and I chose not to ignore it. I realized I was only moving toward the goal because I told myself I would achieve said goal and/or because I shared my goal with others. Initially, it was very difficult for me to accept that the goal I had set was no longer something I was interested in achieving. It was difficult because when I commit myself to a goal task, I would ALWAYS follow through. When times would get tough, I would recite my personal mantra, “there is no contingency for failure“. That mantra, although encouraging, is almost what pressured me to complete a goal that would have been expensive and would not have made me happy. Actually, working toward the goal put me in a funk. I would be frustrated when it was time to complete actions items towards he goal. I would daydream about other things that I could be doing. If you are passionate about a goal; you won’t feel that way when you are working toward the goal. You will be excited to work towards it. The shift I felt allowed me to pose questions and participate in many monologues in my head:
“It’s okay to change my mind about this goal.”
“So what if I shared my goals with other people.”
“What if they ask why I changed my mind? Well, I’ll keep it very real with them; maybe it will encourage them. And if they have something negative to say, so what?! I’m sure my quick whit will find a way to swiftly and politely gather them together in a shady manner.”
So, if you are working towards a goal to please others, you are wasting your time! Life is so short. Seriously! Shorter than you think. Work towards what makes you happy, no matter how far-fetched it may seem to others. Do you really want to leave this life without tapping into a passion that can give you 100% joy, happiness and peace?
1. Write down your goals. Be sure the goal is S.M.A.R.T.
Specific – What do you want to achieve? What is your goal?.
Measurable – Why is this goal so important?
Achievable – What specific steps will you take to reach your goal?
Realistic – Is this something you can do?
Timely – Create a deadline. When do you want to achieve this goal?
2. Does this goal make you happy? If yes, continue. If no, DON’T DO IT!
3. Don’t be afraid to tweak, change or defer your goal.
4. Don’t be shocked if after deferring your goal, the passion for that goals rises up later in life. If that happens, pursue it!
I hope this post encourages someone!